Balancing a college workload, your social life and self-care can be such a struggle.
For this Q & A, I am interviewing a college student in nursing school about how they choose to balance self-care and take care of themselves while also having a demanding course schedule and clinicals.
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Taking time for yourself is important. How do you make this a priority while still tackling the demands of nursing school?
I always try to plan ahead in terms of balancing school work and time for myself. For example, during breaks in between classes I try to get work done so when I go home I can have a bit of time to relax my brain. I sacrifice in some areas to gain in others (instead of a lunch break between classes, I get to have uninterrupted time with my fiancée, or watch a show, or go for a walk, etc.).
It can be hard to think of self care as a priority because I always feel like I could be doing more. Sometimes I can beat myself up over all of the time I “wasted” doing things other than school work. I think people fall into this trap because society often doesn’t place value on time for yourself (for example: time is money; limited vacation time; needing to be ill to take a day off work, etc). However, it’s always more productive to take care of yourself first because it helps you get in the mindset to work and to work intentionally.
Also, I want to bring up that the norm and a sense of pride many people have in nursing school is that you don’t have a life besides school. Which isn’t really a healthy mindset going in, but it also can seem like the truth. Some weeks there is no time for in-depth self care and the best I can do is get myself a coffee to drink while I work. I think it’s just important to count and appreciate the little things you can do for yourself.
2. What advice do you have for other college students about practicing self-care?
Don’t try and do more than you can handle: it is okay to say no.
Take things one day at a time and don’t look too far down the road at what is coming up to do. I try to focus on that day and what I can get done that is due in a shorter period of time. Start with the priority and work your way down the list. Make sure it is feasible and factor in time for yourself. Whether that’s going to the yoga class on campus, grabbing dinner with a friend, taking 30 minutes to watch a show before bed, calling your mom for a chat, or whatever self-care looks like for you. Just find something that helps you decompress and don’t make excuses for why you can’t do it. I often fall into that trap.
Also, if something was not on your list but you completed it, give yourself credit and add it to the list so you can cross it off. It feels nice. ;)
3. How do you balance college, taking time for yourself, and making time for friends & family?
There are times when I am behind and bring my work with me to get-togethers. I allot a certain amount of time for spending time with people, and then when I reach the end of that time, I do my work. If I am not behind on work, I try to plan ahead for my week to ensure that I can get everything done so I can actually take a break and enjoy time with my people. Being with friends and family is a form of self-care for me so this can count as “me time” for the day. But definitely make sure that it does not become your self-care all the time. Time with yourself is important because you cannot pour from an empty cup.
4. What is the most important lesson you’ve learned about self-care while in college?
I have found that investing time in myself makes me more productive and saves time in the long run. If you are feeling stressed and like you can’t do one more second of work without going crazy, that is a good signal that it is time to do something other than college. Fill your cup and give your brain a rest.
5. In your opinion, how can people best support college students in their lives?
Honestly, the little things matter. My mom will sometimes give me a Starbucks gift card so I can get coffee during the week without worrying about the cost (cause we all know Starbucks can be expensive and as college students we need the caffeine but are broke.).
Being okay with just sitting with us while we do work, or understanding why we cannot come to every plan because we have many people to visit with, ourselves/homes to take care of, jobs to attend, and school work to get done.
Calling to check up on us is appreciated as well. A quick phone chat with someone can really go a long way in terms of mental health.
6. Do you feel that colleges view mental health as important as physical health? What do you think (if anything) that colleges could improve in terms of supporting students with their mental health?
I think that some colleges are trying to promote mental health and are raising awareness. My school has therapy dogs that come to campus especially during finals week and there are flyers with information about how to receive help for mental health. There are other activities available that promote mental health as well such as yoga and crafting. You can also go to the health and wellness center for counseling.
However, sometimes it seems like they condemn you for taking a mental health day. If you are out for a day you have to prove the reason why (for example, if you’re sick you need a doctor's note) or notify your professor ahead of time. This can make the guilt of not going to class or needing an extension overcome the need for a break. Or I have heard of people being told that this is what they signed up for and what everyone else is dealing with too. But often if you’re struggling with something, others are too. Studies have shown that college students are facing more stress and are experiencing mental health problems more than ever before, so I can promise that you are not alone. Likely you are even a part of the majority.
7. How do you work through feelings of stress in regards to college?
I work through feelings of stress by first pinpointing what exactly is causing the stress. Is it a project that is due soon which I feel I am behind on? Do I feel I am not competent in a skill that I have to know how to do? Whatever it is, I pinpoint that and then brainstorm what steps I can take to make it better. Maybe that's taking an hour to get tasks done for the project, like researching. Or having someone quiz me on the skill I am worried about. Any baby steps towards the end goal is always helpful.
Also, I find that making lists helps me get rid of mental clutter. Lists allow me to organize in such a way that I can clearly go about my to-do list efficiently. This includes things not related to school work.
Sometimes an outside perspective can be helpful. Having someone read over the paper you keep editing to reassure you you did well or to give advice on what you could fix is a great way to take some pressure off yourself to figure it all out. If you don’t want to ask your peers for their time because they are busy, ask your family, professors, or friends!
8. While in college, it can be really easy to lose the sense of who you are and the things that you enjoy outside of school. What do you enjoy doing outside of school and how do you make time for that?
I actually often have this problem. I will get a day off and I think “Wow, I don’t even know what I do for fun anymore.” The first time I realized I felt that way I knew that needed to change. I think that often people stumble into the issue of identifying themselves with their job (such as college student, nurse, etc.). Not that you can’t take pride in what you do or that it’s not a part of who you are, but it’s not the essence of you as a person. We are a combination of so many character traits, interests, experiences, dreams, and more. It would be a shame to only focus on what you do for a living as being who you are.
I like to look back at who I was as a child and the things I used to enjoy doing. I often go back to that quote: “Who were you before the world told you who to be?” If I think back I remember reading, shooting my bow, baking, walks in nature, playing with my animals, and writing. I also love all of those random adventures I would find in the summer when I had a lot of time on my hands. I personally enjoy reading because it's interesting, gives me new perspectives, and distracts my mind for a while. I try to read a bit before bed instead of scrolling on my phone. It’s nice to allot a certain time of day or have a clear start and end time for your own hobbies. This allows you to have something to look forward to but then you do not accidentally spend too much time on your hobby. Although, it is a good idea to sometimes schedule a whole day where you do not do any sort of work to refresh yourself